A Night I Can't Remember lyrics

Been dang near two years, since I've had a beer
By gosh that's changin' tonight.
Gonna start me a tab, call me a cab,
Might even get in a fight.
I ain't goin' hog wildin' forever,
Gonna have myself a night, I can't remember.

(Chorus)
Miller Lites, shot a Crown,
Man that stuff burns goin down.
One too many Coke and Jack's,
It'll all come floodin back.
That old Cuervo way too strong, but one more 'fore I go home,
Fire up the blender.
Gonna have myself a night, I can't remember.

spoken
oooh... Give me a cold towel... and a gun.

Drunk ain't my style, it'll be a long while,
'Fore I pull that stunt again.

spoken
... oh my head...

Tylenol and Tums, oh no here it comes,
I'm prayin to the porcelyne.
This hangover can't last forever,
Done had myself a night, I can't remember.

(Chorus)
Shut out the lights, kicked down the door,
Woke up face down on the floor.
I better call someone and ask,
"How'd I wind up in this cast?"
I got stamps on both my hands, I wonder who slung that beer can
Right through my winder.
Done had myself a night I can't remember.

Oooh! My dang liver's nearly gone,
In AA's where I belong, hey thanks bartender.
Done had myself a niiight I can't remember.

spoken
Twelve steps my foot, I can't even take two!